Saturday, March 22, 2008

CHiPs


I can guarantee that every time I drive to Sommieres or Nimes I will see an 'incident'. By 'incident' I mean some idiot driving dangerously and putting lives at risk. Driving standards around here are abysmal, compounded by the very knowledgeable drivers who buy the Dacia Logan, the Aixiam or a Daewoo Matiz. Some people seem to think that if you by a shit car and drive it slowly you will be safer. Bollocks. All they do is encourage some impatient idiot to overtake when it's not safe. Take today's bird brain. He's in a Logan. A car which looks like it has been built in an east European factory (just looked it up and it's built in that automobile powerhouse, Romania - I rest my case) that is more used to making sewing machines. It had a tow hook on the back which frankly should always be situated on the front of these cars (because it's always more likely to be towed than tow) and the aerodynamics of a pyramid. In fact it looks more aerodynamic sideways on. Grief, what a mess. Anyway this idiot is driving down a dead straight road and every now and then he inexplicably slams his brakes on. I can't keep far enough away. This morning in Quissac I spotted an Aixiam which is basically a four wheel moped and, according to a report I read, when travelling up hill it's arguably quicker to walk.
Before anyone is allowed out in one of these cars they should have to undergo some kind of intelligence test. If When they fail they should be banned from driving immediately.

Anyway, given all this danger on the road, Jan tried to persuade me not to buy a crash helmet in Lidl this afternoon. I have always wanted a crash helmet, especially the type worn by the California Highway Patrol (remember CHiPs?) and at 39 euros this was a bargain. She said that I would look stupid, even more stupid than normal. Could I persuade her? Why don't women understand?

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